Loneliness is Killing Us
The effect of social isolation on all-cause mortality is equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day! WHAT???
In my courses on brain based approaches to personal and professional wellness, I talk a lot about how we are hard-wired for connection. We are made to live in community and our brains have architecture that doesn't function at its best when we aren't recognizing and prioritizing that OR when we are in communities that are unhealthy or unsafe.
Today, the Surgeon General released a new report and sounded an alarm regarding our social isolation and loneliness. With Americans more lonely and socially disconnected than ever, and the threats to our physical and mental health becoming more and more obvious, personal and policy action is a critical priority.
- In the 1970s, almost half of Americans said they could generally trust other people, according to the surgeon general’s report. Today, less than a third say the same.
- The amount of time that young people (ages 15-24) spend with their friends in person dropped by nearly 70 percent from 2003 to 2020, as long-running trends got worse when the pandemic set in.
- Half of the country says they have three or fewer close friends, double the number from 1990.
- Just 16 percent of Americans say they feel very attached to their local community.
And what we are learning, is that this experience is not neutral. It harms our physical and mental health and impacts the social network and fabric in communities that is meant to be a source of resilience and strength.
Physical Health Impacts
Research has found that social isolation and loneliness are linked to a higher risk of chronic diseases such as heart disease, diabetes, and obesity. Social isolation can also weaken our immune system, making us more vulnerable to infections.
Mental Health Impacts
Social isolation and loneliness are also strongly associated with poor mental health outcomes, including depression, anxiety, and suicide. Lack of social connections can also worsen cognitive decline in older adults.
Factors Contributing to Social Isolation and Loneliness
Several factors contribute to social isolation and loneliness, including aging, poverty, disability, and discrimination. These factors can limit access to social networks and community resources, making it harder to maintain social connections.
Being in poor physical or mental health is also associated with more isolation, suggesting a feedback loop in which loneliness not only contributes to poor health but perpetuates it.
The percentage of households that comprise a single person living by themselves has doubled from 1960 to 2022, to the point that now nearly one in three Americans lives alone.
What We Can Do Collectively
Broadly, the report recommends six pillars for making Americans feel more connected and less isolated from one another:
1. Strengthen the social infrastructure: more communal spaces, more social activities, and better infrastructure to help people access them
2. Develop “pro-connection” public policies that account for the need to foster connection when passing laws or formulating regulations, from transportation to education to housing
3. Mobilize the health sector: train health care providers to identify people at risk of isolation and better equip providers to connect patients with the other forms of social support they may need
4. Reform digital environments: require more transparency from large tech companies and establish safeguards (such as restrictions for young people) that could ameliorate the worst effects of social media on vulnerable populations
5. Deepen our knowledge: support academic research and public information campaigns to improve our understanding of the connections between isolation and health and make people more aware of the problem in the first place
6. Cultivate a culture of connection: use all of the vectors available, from politics to entertainment, to reinforce the values of connection and reduce the polarization that can lead to people feeling more isolated in our modern age
What We Can Do Personally
Are you lonely? Or socially isolated?
Sometimes you can be one and not the other. But either way, you can take steps to improve your social connections.
1. Reach out to friends and family consistently. Perhaps create calendar invites or a schedule so that you prioritize doing so. Maybe make Wednesday the day that you text three people to check in and say hello.
2. Consider joining a local club or group based on your interests, such as a sports team, book club, or gardening group. This can help you meet like-minded people and build new friendships. My local library has all sorts of great meet-ups and because it's in the neighborhood, it's easy to attend.
3. Volunteering can be a great way to connect with others while also making a positive impact in your community. Look for volunteer opportunities at local charities or non-profits.
4. Attend social events in your community, such as concerts, festivals, or art shows. This can be a great way to meet new people and connect with others who share your interests. But even being more intentional about conversations at the grocery store and coffee shop can have positive impacts on your feelings of connection.
5. Consider taking classes at a community center or local college to learn a new skill or hobby. This can be a great way to meet new people and have fun too!
6. Participate in community activities, such as neighborhood clean-up days or local fundraisers. This can help you connect with others in your community and build a sense of belonging. My experience is that having a shared purpose and task makes it easier to connect and make conversation (speaking to my fellow introverts here)
7. Pets can provide companionship and help reduce feelings of loneliness. Consider adopting a cat or dog or volunteering at a local animal shelter.
8. Take care of yourself by getting enough sleep, exercising regularly, and eating a healthy diet. When you feel good physically, you're more likely to feel motivated to connect with others.
9. If you're struggling with feelings of loneliness or social isolation, consider seeking help from a mental health professional. They can provide support and guidance to help you build social connections and improve your well-being. You can start by using a search like the one here: https://findtreatment.gov, using one of the virtual mental health options now available like https://www.betterhelp.com, or reach out to your doctor or insurance provi
Remember, building social connections takes time and effort, but the benefits are well worth it. By taking steps to increase your social connections, you can improve your mental and physical health, boost your happiness and well-being, and build a sense of community and belonging.
And if you are one of the few folks who is NOT feeling isolated or lonely -- look around and see who can reach out to and include in your social circle because almost half of the people you encounter - are looking and hoping for the kind of community that you have. So see if you can make more space at your table.
"Loneliness is far more than just a bad feeling—it harms both individual and societal health. It is associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety, and premature death. The mortality impact of being socially disconnected is similar to that caused by smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day, and even greater than that associated with obesity and physical inactivity. And the harmful consequences of a society that lacks social connection can be felt in our schools, workplaces, and civic organizations, where performance, productivity, and engagement are diminished."
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